Trust Issues

I don't believe you.
Honestly, if you tell me you're going to do something for me, I think there's about a forty percent chance of that happening.
People these days can't commit and it's quite stifling. I think there's very few true friends out there for all of us.
When I say true friend, I don't just mean someone I know who will say hello to me in the hall and give me a smile, I mean someone who sees that I am in trouble and does everything in their power to help.
I miss being a kid, when everyone was right, and when you said you were a dinosaur, you really were a dinosaur.
I don't think we ever grow up. We just get hairy and tall.
We learn from mistakes, and we grow through challenges, but we don't grow up. Inside everyone is a child begging to be a spaceship pilot. I know I want to be a spaceship pilot.
But that's besides the point. The point is I have a difficulty trusting anyone around me. It's really not your fault, it's mine. It's fairly easy to see that I think.
I think the reason I can't trust anyone is because I get thrashed when people break commitments, and I need to learn to trust others without placing faith in them, because people are careless.

I am only one man. boy. child. I am only one person.
I need to realize that everyone else are people as well.
At that point maybe I can trust everyone.
I think that the greatest thing to strive for as Christians, & even as humans really, is to love others, and I can't love without trust.

Don't get me wrong, I'm not talking about universal peace & love, like the hippies, I just mean showing others the care that you would like to be shown. It's the golden rule that is taken for granted every single day.
Today I rediscovered 1 John 4:16, which says "God is love, & the one who resides in love resides in God."

To share the gospel is not to spit out the story of Jesus and hope that we get through to the 'poor lost pagans.' If we do that, we are treating everyone we talk too like a free agent we want on our team. If we show them real love and care, I believe we can reach countless more without saying a word about Jesus.

I'm just as bad as this as anyone, and this is more a journal than anything,
but if you struggle with anything on here, I hope I've helped, and please feel free to come talk to me.
You're fantastic,
Austin.